Things that frustrate me and trying to remember simple joys

*Trying to do laundry over the weekend and finding every single washer in the place full (both times I tried), and a line of people out the door with hampers of dirty laundry.

*Trying to post 3-4 times to LJ and getting timeout errors, and being too irritated to save what I'd written.

*Listening to the radio on the way to work and the DJs don't play a single song, too busy revelling in the sounds of their own voices and lame jokes. Argh.

*Trying to print a rush special order and getting error after error after reboot after error, until I give up.

*Trying to get anything done and only getting more and more and more behind, watching everything spiral out of control.

My flagged-for-quick-follow-up messages are four scroll-screens long now. Ugh...

*sigh* Spent a while last night curled up in Jake's chair trying very hard not to feel sorry for myself and hating everything I tried to draw. I'm just so... tired. Like everyday is this great fight to stay afloat. I'm tired of fighting. I want to read for fun again, and spend guilt-free days without working. I want working on my business to be *fun* again. I want to paint for myself and not beat myself up afterwards for not doing something productive...

Blech. I should know better than to let myself ramble on like this.

I did get to go art supply shopping! That was fun, and I got a great deal, *and* I didn't have to spend any money... I had a $25 gift card from my Sweetie for Christmas. I got a new sketchpad (only 2 pages left in the previous one, and I was never happy with the tooth), titanium white oil paint, artgel (very cool-looking brush and hand cleaner) and this new coated artboard that isn't textured. I painted on it last night, and I really, really liked the picture that I was able to finish. (Though I still think my oils are a little... mmmm... blurry.) When it's dry, I'll post it.

Irony and plans

Heh... about the time people seem to be complaining about angsty entries on LJ, I post one of the top five angsty entris of my LJ career. Probably, anyway. I don't get very angsty.

I also never, ever, ever say 'It can't get worse.' I will never say that again. Second to the last time I said that, I broke my back, followed by a grim, 'well, it really can't get worse than this.' Of course, it did. I *am* feeling maudlin today... I'll stop now.

Anyway, I have developed a plan of attack. Tonight is laundry night (having been thwarted yesterday), followed by swimming, followed by cleaning my desk. Most of my problem is that I go upstairs to my tiny, tiny corner and look at the disaster engulfing my desk, realize there is simply no room to work, get discouraged, and it's all downhill from there. Actually, before I clean the desk I have to get that damn special order printed. Assuming I don't have printer memory problems. I think I know how to solve them. I'm thinking about closing the printing end of my business, but it's about half of my EMG income right now, which would be fairly constrictive. I can't wait until I can go back to working part time. One year. Just one more year.

Anywho... boring day at work, can you tell?