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May. 26th, 2009 02:39 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ellenmillionFails appear to be flailing everywhere this year, so far. Racism, sexism, whatever -ism you'd like to stand up and speak on, there's been a forum for it, all warm and flamey and stuff, and lots of people have made very nice emotional speeches about it. Some people have said smart things about it, and there's lots of discussions about what kind of obligations we have as artists (writers = artists of words) and what we owe people.
I've been sort of quietly watching it, trying to sort out my own thoughts on the topic.
And pretty much, it comes neatly back to what I've always believed: don't be a jerk.
There's some other stuff, like if you say you're going to do something, do it. Or own up to it. And if you want to be shocking, be prepared for bad backlash and do your best with it (often, that means not vehemently defending yourself. In every example I've seen, if the author had said 'wow, that might have been a bad move, but here were my thoughts at the time...' the failing wouldn't have failed so spectacularly.). Sometimes cultural expectations will get in the way, misunderstandings will always happen, and feelings are going to get bruised. But for the most part, it really boils down to not being mean, self-centered or insensitive, and making an effort to understand the people you're trying to connect with.
If I ever start a religion, that will be my First Commandment: Thou shalt not be a jerk.
No one should ever be fool enough to put me in charge of a religion, though, so you may breathe easy.
In less flailing failing news, I had a great time in Juneau. The weather was incredible, we got to go sailing, I spent a few hours drawing in the park and wandered around Juneau, we went hiking at Mendenhall glacier, the trips down and back were very painless (and even fun), and we even got first class back from Anchorage at no charge.
I came back to a gorgeous long weekend in Fairbanks, where Jake and I celebrated our birthdays and I installed a garden. Just some pots, since our house is uber unfinished and the landscaping isn't final anywhere, but it's nice to have some flowers. I'm going to pick up some herb starts and a seed potato* on my way home tonight, and stop by the siding store to talk about getting our house sided. I'm VERY excited about that possibility. (The outside of our house = very, very ugly.)
I'm going to give my meaty mermaid vivid red hair. We'll see if anyone dares to say she looks like Ariel. Hah!
I got Dark Angel DVDs for my birthday, so I suspect that's what I'll be doing this evening. Poor Jake is in Nome!
Today so far, I got my new license (as mine expires tomorrow! And my new picture doesn't suck!), got the tires on my car changed from the winter tires - and while I was at it, I got the oil changed, a new air filter and a new rear windshield wiper, plus some burnout light doohicky replaced. I love my mechanics. (Mike's Chevron, for you locals). I've also written three reports, fielded a billion phone calls, and I've got another 2 reports about to go out. Sooooon, I will be free of the day job for the night. Dark Angel! Broiled salmon! And I might paint the bedroom floor...
*Yes, one seed potato. I haven't met a seed potato yet that didn't have three eyes, and that's how many potato pots I have. I suspect I won't be able to buy them that way, unfortunately.
I've been sort of quietly watching it, trying to sort out my own thoughts on the topic.
And pretty much, it comes neatly back to what I've always believed: don't be a jerk.
There's some other stuff, like if you say you're going to do something, do it. Or own up to it. And if you want to be shocking, be prepared for bad backlash and do your best with it (often, that means not vehemently defending yourself. In every example I've seen, if the author had said 'wow, that might have been a bad move, but here were my thoughts at the time...' the failing wouldn't have failed so spectacularly.). Sometimes cultural expectations will get in the way, misunderstandings will always happen, and feelings are going to get bruised. But for the most part, it really boils down to not being mean, self-centered or insensitive, and making an effort to understand the people you're trying to connect with.
If I ever start a religion, that will be my First Commandment: Thou shalt not be a jerk.
No one should ever be fool enough to put me in charge of a religion, though, so you may breathe easy.
In less flailing failing news, I had a great time in Juneau. The weather was incredible, we got to go sailing, I spent a few hours drawing in the park and wandered around Juneau, we went hiking at Mendenhall glacier, the trips down and back were very painless (and even fun), and we even got first class back from Anchorage at no charge.
I came back to a gorgeous long weekend in Fairbanks, where Jake and I celebrated our birthdays and I installed a garden. Just some pots, since our house is uber unfinished and the landscaping isn't final anywhere, but it's nice to have some flowers. I'm going to pick up some herb starts and a seed potato* on my way home tonight, and stop by the siding store to talk about getting our house sided. I'm VERY excited about that possibility. (The outside of our house = very, very ugly.)
I'm going to give my meaty mermaid vivid red hair. We'll see if anyone dares to say she looks like Ariel. Hah!
I got Dark Angel DVDs for my birthday, so I suspect that's what I'll be doing this evening. Poor Jake is in Nome!
Today so far, I got my new license (as mine expires tomorrow! And my new picture doesn't suck!), got the tires on my car changed from the winter tires - and while I was at it, I got the oil changed, a new air filter and a new rear windshield wiper, plus some burnout light doohicky replaced. I love my mechanics. (Mike's Chevron, for you locals). I've also written three reports, fielded a billion phone calls, and I've got another 2 reports about to go out. Sooooon, I will be free of the day job for the night. Dark Angel! Broiled salmon! And I might paint the bedroom floor...
*Yes, one seed potato. I haven't met a seed potato yet that didn't have three eyes, and that's how many potato pots I have. I suspect I won't be able to buy them that way, unfortunately.
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no subject
Date: 2009-05-27 02:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-05-27 05:53 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-05-27 09:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-03 03:23 am (UTC)You mean, be humble instead of defensive? Acknowledge that we (even authors etc.) can make mistakes?
Yeah. Hard but worth doing! (And even when we can, doesn't mean we can phrase our "I screwed up" in ways that those we've made unhappy can _hear_ as apologies.. but we try and keep trying)
(I WILL say she looks like Ariel SHOULD -- my littlest sis decided to go by her first name (Ariel) after seeing the movie at age 5 or so)